The Fear of Everyone Leaving Keeps Me Leaving First
on new song + video Falling From and Further, disorganized attachment, upcoming UK/EU tour, etc.
Greetings ❤️
Today I am delighted to share my new song Falling From and Further along with the accompanying music video. This video is my first experience directing and editing, and I’m so grateful to have worked with brilliant friends Derrick Alexander as DP and Vanessa Castro as colorist, as well as my beautiful bandmates Sarah Clausen, Meredith Nesbitt, Lily Finnegan and dear friend Av Grannan as my movement partner.
Falling From and Further reckons with fear of abandonment and the subsequent push and pull of disorganized attachment in pursuit of security—I wanted to visually encapsulate that juxtaposition of intimacy with this video as well as illuminate the retrospective nature of my writing. Av Grannan and I are the embodiment of my past in different contexts, and we did contact improvisation to convey the experiences of oscillation, mistrust, interdependence, isolation, security, holding, and releasing through movement.
Shooting this video was truly one of the most joyful experiences I’ve had, and I’m so proud of what we made musically and visually. Collaboration is life, thank you to everyone I’ve worked with on this one.
Falling From and Further is the door into my new creative chapter and forthcoming project—achieving the poignant vulnerability, grounded whimsy, and measured experimentalism that I endeavor in my work. This song was a breakthrough for me in reckoning with the roots of my relational past, and holding space for the fearful parts of me that are slowly learning to trust. It is my hope, as always, that my writing can be an invitation for others to feel seen and see themselves more truly.
sandcastles every day, built again then washed away
when all came and passed through i never knew what i meant to you
in diminishment, the wake of a lacking trust
breathe the breakage fast and let it last to
feel it all, feel it all
in the blinding lights on the highway
i merge where it hurts
shoulders narrow guiding
brevity of the turning
the fear of everyone leaving keeps me leaving first,
when my world grows smaller falling from and further toward to feel it all
feel it all
i lose track of the life i've lived
recalled through sudden losses
it's all there and gone the same,
lessons in forgetting
more than this i wish for time back
more than this i wish for time
more than this i wish to
feel it all
TOUR TOUR TOUR TOUR
I’m also here to share about August and September touring in the UK and EU! UK shows are headline dates and tickets are on sale now and EU dates are supporting Florist—tickets can also be found on my website. Spread the word to your EU/UK friends!
17 July Brooklyn, NY Fire Talk Shop
08 August Haldern, Germany Haldern Pop Festival
17 August Brecon Beacons, UK Green Man Festival
19 August London, UK The Lexington
21 August Ipswich, UK The Smokehouse
22 August Leeds, UK Brudenell Social Club
23 August Manchester, UK The Castle Hotel
24 August Glasgow, UK The Hug and Pint
26 August Newcastle, UK Cluny 2
29 August Dublin, IE Bello Bar
31 August Berlin, Germany Kantine am Berghain
01 September Hamburg, Germany Aalhaus
02 September The Hague, Netherlands PAARD
03 September Groningen, Netherlands Vera
04 September Breda, Netherlands Mezz
05 September Brussels, Belgium Botanique
11 September Milan, Italy Arci Bellezza
14 September Vienna, Austria Chelsea
15 September Munich, Germany Bellevue di Monaco
16 September St. Gallen, Switzerland Palace St. Gallen
17 September Fribourg, Switzerland Fri-son
18 September Paris, France Le Trabendo
19 September Tourcoing, France Le Grand Mix
(not yet formally announced but mark your calendar):
17 October Chicago, IL Constellation Nested in Tangles Orchestra Album Release Show
05 November Washington, DC
06 November Philadelphia, PA
09 November Burlington, VT
11 November Montreal, Canada
12 November Toronto, Canada
14 November NYC National Sawdust Nested in Tangles Orchestra Album Release Show
Then hitting the West Coast in December probably?
OK that’s all I’ve got for now, thank you for being here. Much more comin’.
See you out there xoxoxo
BIG LOVE,
HF
